In the summer of 1989, Tim Burton's film adaptation of Batman came along and kicked all kinds of box-office ass. No matter what you think of the flick, it was quite a pop-culture phenomenon. As you would expect, the advertising campaign was vicious. After Batman was a proven hit, well, ca-ching! Good lawd was there ever money to be made, and the opportunity wasn't passed up. Bat-logos ended up being slapped onto just about everything. It's no surprise this Bat-flood of Bat-products (ouch, that was painful) carried over into the cereal aisle as well.
Produced by Ralston, Batman Cereal was your typical corn-based fare, only...shaped like little bats. What fun! It looked a bit like some sort of mutated Cap'n Crunch in color and texture. In a possible effort to mask such similarities, the chosen flavour (with a u) was honey-nut. I'm not sure that would have been anyone's first choice, but those Ralston guys were trailblazers, man.
As for the other ingredients? Any parents concerned about what their kids were about to shovel into their sugar-addicted bodies must've been oh-so calm after reading the wonderfully informative blurb on the packaging's top-right corner. Tropical oils? Bah! Batman Cereal had no such thing! It was good and PURE, with a whopping nine essential vitamins and minerals! Nine of them! That isn't vague at all!
Ahem. I'm sure these boasts of nutritional value were about as effective as the "No Trans Fat" blurb on potato chip packaging today. Doctor it up however you want; we know this shit isn't good for us. Lucky for the manufacturers of such nonsense, most consumers throw caution to the wind and purchase even the most horrible food out there in droves. When some cursory relation to the likes of Batman has been slapped on...ooh, even better!
The fine folks at Ralston didn't leave it at that however. Remember that aggressive marketing I mentioned? Look no further than the Batman Cereal commercial:
Oh. Oh, my. I've never seen anything so dramatic in my life! I'm unable to recall seeing this as a child, but I think I would have been too flippin' scared not to make Batman Cereal my breakfast of choice if I had.
What's that? Still not convinced? Fine, have yourself an insane bonus with purchase:
Yeah! Fuck yeah! Buy Batman Cereal...get a cheap, tacky-ass Michael Keaton Batman coin-bank! This wasn't any "find the prize inside!" affair either! This mother was strapped right to the outside of the package! Geez. Those Ralston guys really went for the throat! Exclamation marks!
Speaking from personal experience...it worked. It would seem I actually asked for Batman Cereal upon the inclusion of the bank, because I clearly remember owning one. I don't remember being interested in the cereal itself, but that ugly little coin-bank reeled me right in. You were so easily swayed, Chris Keating of 1989. Perhaps we all were.
The product's initial run didn't make it past 1990, but it did come back for an encore when Batman Returns hit theaters in 1992. Its rule over the cereal aisle may have been short, but as long as there are geeky SOBs like me running around, Batman Cereal will never be forgotten.
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I gave Adam F. Goldberg who created the tv show The Goldbergs one of these (except I put a copy of my Knight Rider book inside) cereal boxes as part of a 80's gift package I called, "The Retro Box". My inspiration for including this box came from seeing it constantly in the background of The Stash from AMC's Comic Book Men.
ReplyDeleteHere's a photo Adam took of it at his office. Might have to c/p the link to see it.
https://twitter.com/adamfgoldberg/status/435472333457723392/photo/1
-Nick
@KRCompanion
I still own one with bank still attached been in storage since the late 80's
ReplyDeleteI remember Batman cereal tasting like Mr T cereal from a few years earlier.
ReplyDelete