I don't have much of either, in any regard. Since this is on the blog, let's apply it specifically to the blog. I've fallen back under the spell of failing to add any content to this thing. There's all sorts of issues deterring me. Excuses, excuses. I could probably make some time for it but it's hard to care. One factor - there's the knowledge that no one would really give a damn if I did. At the same time, if I let that deter me, no one will ever start giving a damn. A cyclical wonder!
There's all of life's little woes and responsibilities distracting me as well. That's to be expected I suppose. This is what really amps up my respect for guys like Vangelus that seem to be so immensely productive. He's probably got his share of life being a massive cuntbitch to him as well...and yet the awesomeness prevails. I wish that could be me.
I wish so many things.
I wish I had more dedication, more inspiration, more motivation, and more of other positive tion's. I know all too well however that there's a distinct difference between wishers and doers. I've been saying shit like this for years and I'm still just kind of going through the motions. I'd like to promise, to myself if no one else specifically, that this will all change, but realistically...I'm just not sure.
It is a terrible thing that motivation is often so hard to wrestle and maintain. Procrastination and laziness are so easy they should be outlawed. I think we all are guilty of this from time to time, so I wouldn't be so hard on yourself, it's an entirely human trait. Inspiration too can be illusory and distant. I know how frustrating it can be, like snatching at smoke.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you just need a change of pace or scenery to re-energize your spirits, or perhaps the right combination of music and coffee will get your motor purring again. Dedication to a given goal is driven by passion, and I know you have that in you. I suppose the tricky part is drawing it out, overcoming all bullshit in the process. I certainly don't have any answers though, as more often than not I fall into patterns of laziness and self-pity myself. Discipline is slippery. It's all too ugly to contemplate. But great results are born through strife. I believe in you my young friend! Go forth and conquer!