It's been said that you should write about what you know. Today, I've been firm friends with a bunch of bleh. It's been one of those days where I half want to throw my hands up in the air and give up on everything. I'm not going to by any means, but it's becoming hard to ignore that I've basically been in a funk of sorts for a little while now. I've gotten some things done, but not as much as I'd like. That's never a good feeling.
The overall cruddy vibe can even be extended to my work with Castle Geek-Skull. A while back, I told myself I'd like to publish at least three posts per day, one each for toys, gaming, and comics. That was probably some time in May, and well, it's still not happening. How could this be?
Before addressing that, let me just say that I know this foray into "real talk" isn't the most fun. It might not have the draw of Shovel Knight Butt Mode videos or a rundown of weird Pryde of the X-Men moments, but I figure going over it might be helpful. If you have your own creative endeavors, perhaps you can get something from it as well.
For everyone else, does it help that I'm wearing a Mario shirt while I write this?
Anyway, let's just get on with it. I know one of the biggest issues regarding how prolific I am with Castle Geek-Skull centers around how many unfinished drafts I amass. I'm not hurting for article/post ideas by any stretch. In fact, they come to me all the time. I'll even basically write articles in my head, with the exact wording simply coming to me. Something happens from there however. A lot of the time, I'll sit down to write, and I hit a wall within the first paragraph. I'm a bit puzzled by this given how easily the ideas tend to flow. I'm not sure if it's really the dreaded "Writer's Block." I'm wondering if it's actually a writing version of "Red Light Fever."
I also moonlight as a guitarist and I come up with new riffs all the time. I generally record everything just in case I ever find a way to use it one day. Often times, I'll find myself totally screwing something up once I've hit "record" despite having played it effortlessly beforehand. This is the "Red Light Fever" phenomenon and it's actually quite common among musicians. It's as if there's an unspoken and unconscious nervousness that comes over you when you know what you're playing is going to be committed to "tape." It's pretty funny to experience this even when I'm the only freaking person that's going to hear it.
Regardless, with plenty of "Red Light Fever" in my past, I think that's exactly what I experience with a lot of my hopeful Castle Geek-Skull posts. I know what I want to do, but some part of me totally derps out as soon as it becomes time to set it stone. Maybe "Writer's Block" is just one side of the same coin.
Unfortunately, there are a few other issues that tend to keep my unfinished posts in limbo once they get there. If an idea sits long enough, I start to feel it's too late to finish it anymore. Some are indeed a bit "time sensitive" as far as their relevance. Also, I sometimes see other sites put up content similar to something I was hoping to do, and it makes me feel I should just abandon whatever my take was going to be altogether. The last thing I want Castle Geek-Skull to be seen as is some kind of copycat. I'd prefer it to be as original as possible. I want this to be a site that's truly worth visiting.
I could drone on, but you know what this all sounds like? Needless worrying. Gasp! I've gone through many years of similar self-defeating silliness. It's a shame that there's still some left even after so many "hey, just do it" realizations, but maybe being able to recognize the issue is a good step. Whatever tidy little term you want to use to define this wackiness, my hope is that I'll find the impetus to keep pushing past it as best I can by addressing it publicly. Perhaps it's time to just get all of these drafts finished up and posted. Draftpocalypse 2014. Let's go.
Whoa, what was that? Did you like it? Do you feel like you're never coming to this site again? Feel free to kick me in the face with your feedback via the comment section, Twitter, or Facebook!
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